A few months ago, Toby Northcote-Smith took a highly valued chair from my office without asking. He made no effort to return it. A while later, I decided to “borrow” some his beloved paper frogs as insurance. I finally got the chair back but only after sending him photographic evidence of his frogs being subject to staplers and paper clips. Toby then publicly accused me of “frognapping” in front of the entire office. In response, I littered a moderate quantity of peanut shells all over Toby’s desk.

From there, it got more even more involved. I arrived one morning several weeks ago to find my office covered in styrofoam peanuts, the kind typically used for shipping. My desk was completely covered. I opened the drawers of my desk and found even more peanuts. It took me over an hour to clean it all up!

The latest in the escalating inter-office war took place last night and it was my time to get back for the styrofoam peanuts. It was time to move Toby’s desk along with his Milton Waddams / Office Space inspired red stapler to a more meaningful place. This is how it all went down: